Gnome if you want to, gnome around the world

I went all over this crazy state yesterday.  I took the kids toward the western part of NC to abandon them place them into the loving care of their grandparents.  And, hello, isn’t it supposed to be officially Spring?



Thirty-nine degrees, people!

In the SOUTH.

In March.

And who packed shorts for her kids for the next three days?

I enjoyed the ride over.  The boys were great travelers.  Especially since they were surprised by the new BOLT DVD we bought for them as a fun treat.  They popped that puppy in and wrapped themselves in a little Disney Magic while I tried every magic word I knew to get morning rush hour traffic unsnarled.  Seriously, I moved out of DC to get away from that mess.  Eesh!


Now before some of you leave comments about me not watching the road, I’ll have you know that I WAS watching the road, and that’s why this picture is catywampus and shows the true state of my Surburban.  And this is a good day for the floorboard in my car.  I had actually tidied it 10 minutes before the picture was taken.  It didn’t take them six seconds to un-tidy it. And my mother wonders why I never bother to clean the house.

With the kids safely ensconced in my mother-in-law’s minivan and smothered with enough kisses to get them (and me) through the next three days until we’re all back together (and threatened within an inch of their lives to be on their best behavior), I found myself with a few hours to spend before my next appointment.  As I drove through Greensboro, I saw a billboard for a pottery/decorator place that my friend had mentioned to me, so I took advantage of not having the boys (thus not having to worry about the store enforcing the  “you break it you buy it” policy) and pulled over and went in.


Old Time is really a decorator’s heaven.  I am not a decorator (and am currently using all my imaginative skills to imagine a day that the principal doesn’t call), but sometimes I pretend I know what I’m doing.  I was trying to find some apothecary jars like my talented friend Gretchen has, but I broke out in hives over all the different kinds and then I started to second guess what I’d do with them, and then I got to envisioning jars filled with cute stuff AND Legos, so I bailed on it all.  But not after walking around and fingering everything for a solid two hours.

I did see some interesting things, though, that I quite didn’t know what to make of ….


Not Banana, mind you. Banana LEAF.  I’ve burned banana leaves before.  Let me tell you, I don’t want to pay for the privilege to smell it again.

I’d rather have this scent wafting through my house:


There were a lot of these:



But THIS takes the cake, er, cheese….


Really, a RODENT grater?

I think I’ll just stick to parmesan….

And then I got lost, drove halfway to Charlotte before I could find a spot to turn around, went to the mall, bought stuff I didn’t need but I had a gift certificate for,  refreshed my makeup at Sephora, and met girlfriends for supper.  And didn’t get home until 10:00.

Gno more roaming for me.

Have a mice day.

9 responses to “Gnome if you want to, gnome around the world

  1. Looks like they’ve restocked the gnomes!

  2. What’s decorating? I’m under the strict impression that if it doesn’t involve a Spiderman hanging from a light fixture or framed pictures of my kids doing everything but smiling….then it isn’t worthy of coming in the doors of my home.

    We’ll have pretty houses one day….right?

    And your love for vanilla wafer candles just sealed up the deal that you are in fact my kindred spirit.

  3. mouse grater?

    ugh. oh. ick.

    ps: I’ll have that song stuck in my head for DAYS. thanks.

  4. i moved here from dc too… what part?

    and amber, i’m with you… i currently have 3 (count em, 3!) spiderman toys (from happy meals, I think) hanging (upside down, of course) from their webslingers… on my family room fireplace mantle!!! lovely! the funny/scary thing is, I don’t even notice them– they’ve been there for months… i wonder how many friends have noticed but didn’t want to comment! 🙂

    thanks for the grins today! very clever use of “gnome”!!

  5. Totally with you on the decorator stores…I get very overwhelmed and forget what I’m looking for…then get a little cranky because I don’t have time to decorate my house..then I remember how badly it needs to be painted..then I remember that I can’t paint until I grade all the math lessons…it’s not an enjoyable experience, so I don’t go anymore.

    Enjoy your mommy days off!

  6. Some of those gnomes look a little dwarf-y to me.

    I can’t believe you didn’t buy the plates we discussed!

    • Oh.

      Now that you mention it…

      I wish I had figured that out before I named this post and commenced the nonstop B-52s in my head.

  7. Okay…much to say:

    1. Love all things Disney…good thing b/c our van DVD is forever stuck on “George of the Jungle”…it won’t eject nor switch to another DVD…so, “me George, you Ursula” is forever in my head.

    2. Since I’m “next door” in GA…I am so feelin’ ya with this weather snafu…

    3. Ah Decorator Stores…I have a love/hate relationship with those places…so many ideas. so little funds.

    4. THREE.whole.days???

    5. Back to the store and their apparent shortage of gnomes…”Norman” our gnome sits, er, sat on our little stoop off the back deck but did not survive Winter Storm ’09 (he was slightly fragile from the bazillion times the kids or the dog knocked him a’windin’)…and guess where he is now?? Still keeled over in the pinestraw. Man, what blantant disregard for his mythical little life. For shame.

  8. We’ve been in the mountains all week, wearing the same sweatshirts and jeans b/c it is FREEZING up here! Where is spring?!

    Old Time is one of my favorites!!! I haven’t been to the Greensboro one yet. I’m a little jealous, gnome what I mean?

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