Game on

Onward and upward, and thank you for your encouragement. I learned yesterday that you don’t scare easily.  You also learned that I can be very very very wordy sometimes.

And is anyone having trouble seeing my Blogroll, etc. on the side?  All my links seem to have disappeared even though it says they should be visible.  I MAY change my theme/layout tomorrow in an attempt to bring them back.

Do not be alarmed.

UPDATE:  I am playing with backgrounds to see if that makes a difference.  Don’t be alarmed if you check back in during the day and everything looks funky.  It’s still me.  Still talking about the inanity of my day……

FINAL UPDATE:  Oh, THAT’S what a widget is….I finally figured it out.  Aren’t you glad?  And now I have an archive!  Yay!

Carry on.


So I went back to Kroger yesterday and I couldn’t believe it – they actually let us in the door.  I learned my lesson from the last visit and sent the boys ahead to scout for other items so that I could browse the cereal aisle alone.  I only bought one box this time, and the kids were thoroughly disgusted that it did not include a prize.

I was pleased to make it through checkout with no toe cramps, and I was doubly pleased that I could fit the groceries in my car.  Had I gone to the store yesterday, there would have been no room in the inn.  My car was such a wreck on the inside that I fully expected it to appear as a line item in the federal budget as a SuperFund cleanup site.  I literally could NOT OPEN THE DOOR without something falling out.

Last week I had to hold up carpool because T’s FAVORITE BALL (really, they’re all his favorite, but who’s keeping track) fell out and bounced across the road and ran down the curb gutter all the way around to where the line turns, so I was dodging traffic to retrieve it, all the while muttering under my breath and praying the PTA president wouldn’t see me.  I’m already on her hit list for carpool line violations, so I didn’t want to push her over the edge. (As an aside, we are generally friendly even though she flipped me off once before she realized it was I in the big SUV that commanded control of the center lane.  We had differing views as to who had the right of way.  This issue may or may not be resolved at press time).

All that to say, I finally had one too many things fall out when I opened the door, so I gave in and cleaned the car out so that we wouldn’t repeat that little scenario again this week.

Here, in no particular order, is what I pulled out of my car:

A feather (Big one.  Vulture, I’m thinking.  Who knows where it came from or what microscopic bugs it deposited on one or three of my chargelings.)

A pickle slice (Singular.  Stuck to the carpet.)

The boys’ Sunday School nametags (Oh, marvelous.  Just wait ’til their teacher finds out that in addition to skipping class, they’re stealing from church.  Add that to the prayer list.)

A lizard (dead)

A wet shirt inside a closed plastic bag (This was from Field Day four days ago – did anyone bother to tell Mom they had a wet shirt in a bag and that it might mold inside a warm car unless we brought it inside?  Um, that would be a “no”.)

A partially inflated balloon

A partially chewed deflated balloon (Chewed, really?)

A Lands End Christmas catalog (They mailed them out early this year.  Promise.  You haven’t received yours?)

A flag football handbook and 2 pair of flag football shorts (Um, Craig?  I don’t need your help in junking up my car.  You have your own.)

Two more feathers (At this point, I’m starting to worry about finding the bird.)

A second, solitary pickle slice (Also stuck to the carpet.)

89 Lego pieces (I counted.)

Aren’t you feeling better about yourself now?

Tengan buen dia.

(That’s my Cinco de Mayo way of telling you all to, you know, have a nice day.)


28 responses to “Game on

  1. My trunk is full of camping gear and the interior smells of wet Boy Scout. They just don’t make a Febreeze for that.

  2. You know, it’s pretty much a waste of time to clean vehicles that transport children. I’ve given up. I tell myself that it’s not my fault that the automaker didn’t think to lose the carpet and put vinyl…EVERYWHERE! And…include a hose attachment on the dash so you can jet-spray all the crud out the back of the van / SUV. I figure my idea is worth a million bucks, but I’m too busy to make the calls!

    On another note…PTA lady flipping you off?? Now that’s hilarious…I would have paid a lot of money to see her face when she recognized you!

    Have a great Cinco de Mayo..

  3. You are so stinkin’ hilarious. reading this post just makes my day!! I can totally identify with your findings in your car. Happy Cinco de Mayo!

  4. Your PTA pres flipping you off is actually funny. I can see our pres doing that but not even CARING who it was. She’s nice and all, but this is NOT the South…it’s a different bird entirely.

    Oh, my van is never clean. Even when it is. I’d make you feel really good about yourself…really good.

  5. I can’t see your links.

  6. The lizard gets me! Was it dead when it entered the car? If not, couldn’t it have survived by eating the pickle slices? What a mystery!

  7. I love that the PTA pres flipped you off. HA! I wonder if she reads your blog?!

    Our best friends moved a couple of years ago and when they came for a visit a while back, their daughter got in my car and said “Yep, still messy!”

  8. One box of cereal?!

    • carpoolqueen

      Only because somebody *raises hand* forgot it was teacher appreciation day and I had to make a sweet treat. Made snack mix. The recipe didn’t call for making it with Cocoa Puffs.

  9. I love you…I know we would be friends if you lived in my town… or maybe we were sorority sisters in a previous life. I love the carpool stuff and so appropriate since you *are* the queen. So…I have to share this with you…I think you can relate. This is a funny one:
    This is a nostalgic one:

    Have a great day….

  10. Oh I love reading about other people’s messes. It just makes me feel so much better about mine. I mean I might even clean out my car. Probably not though.

  11. It’s too early in myday to be laughing so much.

    But that’s okay. I’ll adjust.

    As a former OPT president (our version of PTA), i did my level best to dispel the stereotypes and realities. I cursed people behind their backs, under my breath, in my car, on the way home. In the dark. After the meetings.


    Glad I’m not the only one whose car should come with a “warning: fallout” label.

    For us, it was usually empty waterbottles which rolled out the the minivan door the second the principal opened it to greet and walk in the kids to school.

    I made sure to befriend her.

    Found out she had a minivan and 3 kids.


  12. I’m so glad to hear that other people have things fall out of their car when they open the doors. Where do all of y’all exist? Every car I EVER see is spotless and still has the “new car” smell. Mine, on the other hand, ALWAYS smells like a stale cheeseburger mixed with adolescent hormones and sweaty feet. CPQ…you make me smile. You are the real deal. I wish we were sisters.

  13. A dead lizard? GROSS!!!! 🙂

  14. On my to do list, when the sun finally shines again on Arkansas, is to clean out my van. My kids have already cleaned out two wal-mart bags worth of trash and it hasn’t made a dent. You all make me feel normal. Thank you. I heart you. Because I’m with Karen, every car I see seems to be clean. Along with most houses. I’m hoping expectations aren’t raised for me now that I’m unemployed. Clean is just boring, right?

  15. I find that if you put a new, yummy airfreshner in your car, it makes you FEEL like you have a clean car…almost.

    Ok, not really, but at least you don’t gag from moldy shirt, stale fry, stinky feet, where-did-my-before-kids-car-go? smell…

  16. I have a “friend” who had her car cleaned by a professional car detailer. After he was finished and she was writing out the check, he politely asked her to never call him again.

  17. Oh, Cathy, I think I love you. Purrrrfect idea. Except it can’t swing from the rearview mirror. I get all anxiousy-like- a-cat when that happens.

  18. You know your car is bad when your kids would rather ride with their dad in the truck.

    Glad to know I’m “NORMAL???!!!”

    Thanks for making me smile!

  19. Oh, you make me laughed. And, while I missed your post yesterday, today’s was worth the wait. I’d have to take a day off of blogging if I were to tackle my vehicle, too. I have printed your post as proof to my hubby that I’m not the only one out there. He hates that my car always smells like food, and I tell him it is because I transport children – and it isn’t all food that he’s smelling. Oh, just to be a go-to-work dad one day in my life. Just think of all the perks – clean car, quiet lunch, going to the bathroom alone,… *BLISS*

  20. Weeellll….I’m really not sure any of that beats flipping up the seat to have dried milk on the seat and 3 12 year old boys yelling ooohhh groooosssss! Pretty sad if it grosses out 12 year old boys….

  21. Wow! Both to the finding in the car and the “new look” of the blog. very nice.

    A lizard and two pickles? Really?

    I’m betting you eventually find the bird.

  22. Again, I love your honesty. My husband is always complaining that I keep the car too messy. He has actually found mold growing under the boys car seats.

    We often forget the wet shirt in the plastic bag. And, we often have chewed balloons???

  23. Like the new look, by the way.
    Meant to ask if the photo in your previous header was of somewhere special.

    A lizard? Really? Better dead, I suppose. Gives me shivers thinking about a live one crawling around the back seat.

    I always tell my hubster to look on the bright side of a messy car:
    If we crashed down a hill and no one found us, we could survive for several days on leftovers.

  24. My van still stinks like skunk. And the peanut butter and jelly sandwich that was stuck to the carpet under the back seat for 3.5 months. Nice. And I have an L.L. Bean Christmas catalog. Also shipping early this year.

  25. I’ll see your 89 Lego pieces and raise you 13 Hot Wheels…

    Oh the entrails of Minnie the Van.

    One of the things that I can’t stand is the fast food cup with enough liquid to disintegrate the bottom so when you pick it up the liquid flows into the DVD player and causes Brendan Frasier as George of the Jungle to be forever.and ever. stuck in there.

  26. I found a bunch (literally, on the vine) of raisins once under someone’s seat. It was the easiest science lesson I’ve ever done.

  27. laughed all the way out loud.

    if you’re ever in california and meet my friend lisa, don’t let her tell you about the waffle in my van.

    it’s a lie.

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