Tweeps Ask Sus

I miss my Whimzie. She’s in the middle of unpacking from the move and doesn’t have her computer up and running,which means that she and I can’t IM each other twenty million times a day to ask such earth-shattering questions such as “Is it The Farmer in the Dell? or The Farmer in the Dale?”  I get half of my blog inspiration from conversations that she and I have, and without her on the other side of the send button, my well has run dry.

Enter Twitter.

And why didn’t I think of this before?

I lamented to my Tweeps that I had zero to say, which shouldn’t be alarming since I pretty much don’t ever say anything here anyway, but my friends rose to the occasion and lobbed 40 bajillion questions to @carpoolqueen and saved the day.  Here are a few:

@lisa1219 and @whimzie said “Hey Sus – how about a tortilla tutorial?”

tortillas

Is that not the saddest tortilla you’ve ever seen?  It’s not even round!  I’m sure my Guatemalan friends are hanging their heads in shame.

In my defense, I was hungry and I just wanted to get it made, and besides, it wasn’t  like Martha was coming for dinner.

There are two ways to go about making homemade tortillas.  You can buy the masa harina (brand name Maseca  – at your local Walmart – sorry, @baxleydavis) and follow the instructions on how to make the dough; 002

or you can stop by your nearest Latin market and head to the refrigerated section and buy a big bag of pre-made dough (and try not to get grossed out by the pig heads).  This is the method I prefer.

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Whichever method you choose, once the dough is made, break off a chunk about the size of a small apricot and form it into a ball.

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Stick it into a ziplock bag that’s been cut down the sides for ease of opening, make sure it’s covered, and smush down with the bottom of a pot or pan.

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While you’re smushing, preheat a cast iron skillet on the stove until it’s piping hot (no oil).  Drop your tortilla into the dry pan and toast for approximately 1-2 minutes per side. (It’s okay if you get some little char bits on it – it’s like roasted corn – the dark parts have more flavor.)

tortillas

You can put them in a warm oven to hold if you’re making a bunch, but since I’m the only one in this house that eats corn tortillas (I have failed miserably as a mother), I just eat them hot out of the skillet with a little butter, kosher salt, and a squeeze of lemon.

Or with scrambled eggs and refried black beans for breakfast.

Or lunch.

Or dinner.

The possibilities are endless.

@lifeat7000feet said, “Hey Sus, any words that make you cringe?”

Funny you should mention that, Mer.  I was just telling someone the other day that the word “flesh” gives me the heebie jeebies.  In fact, I had asked my dad to read scripture at our wedding and gave him carte blanche to pick what he wanted to read and he read the part about the two  becoming one flesh and I almost heaved in the middle of my wedding ceremony.

I also don’t like the word that denotes infection (starts with a p, three letters) or that other p word that describes women of delicate proportions.

@whimzie wanted to know where her spoons were, why I didn’t like blondes, had I decided on the mouse, and if I had Xanax.

My issue with blondes mainly stems from certain gentlemen who seemed to prefer them instead of me, and Whimzie gets grandfathered in on the no-blonde thing because I’ve seen so many different colors on her head that I couldn’t even tell you what the original color should be.

And I’ve decided against the mouse, mainly because I don’t think my mother will come visit me if I do.  And since her visits are the only time my laundry is caught up and my floor mopped, I don’t want to risk that never being done again.

And I have no idea where your spoons are, but try looking in the box labeled “Attic”.

The Xanax is on its way.

Have a nice day.


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15 responses to “Tweeps Ask Sus

  1. I was hungry for a tortilla until I read about the three letter word that implies infection…

  2. I’m a little slow, so I’m still playing Wheel of Fortune in my head trying to figure out the second p word. It’ll come to me. In the middle of the night.

  3. I’ve always wondered what Maseca was! Now I have cause to purchase my own! At least I could before I was banned from Walmart.

    Amber, the other “p” word rhymes with ” mesquite.”

    I called Mother Goose and she prefers “Dell,” although ironically she owns a Mac.

    I resemble that hair color comment, by the way.

    I have to go soak my phone-texting thumbs now so I can go look in the attic for my spoons.

    P.S. I miss you, too.

    • Hey Whimz – for your next move (sorry if that depresses you. Personally it would make me look for the nearest tall building) place your flatware on the high value inventory. That way it is special marked and quick and easy to find. Just a trick my military mom taught me. 🙂
      ~Michelle

  4. Oh, and how impressed was I that you had an actual apricot (as opposed to a virtual one, I guess) to use for size comparison in the tortilla tutorial!! Nice!

  5. Just for you, CPQ:

  6. Ok, so now I need to know:

    Did you go buy an apricot just for the tutorial or did you already have it and decide that the dough might as well be that size since you happened to have this apricot handy?

    I’m not sure my blessed Wal-Mart carries Maseca and I’m sure we don’t have a Latin market. Which is just as well since I’m not into pig heads.

  7. I think I just became a fan of “imnotned”.

    Sorry for my blondeness. Nature is taking it away much quicker than I’d like.

  8. I didn’t know you were anti-blondes. Hmmm … I may have to rethink this friendship. Or maybe I’ll just only share photos with you of me not in my natural state. There is ample evidence to share. 🙂

  9. I didn’t know you were a hair colorist. I’m feeling a little offended. Should I? I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. 🙂

  10. totally get the missing that odd conversation all day with a dear old friend… whenever that happens to me I am always surprised at how it affects me.

    counting down the moments.

  11. p_s? Ewww. Second word…petite??

    Flesh makes me think of raw chicken.

  12. Xanax is good. I believe the name originates from the greek goddess Xan- a mother of 10 without any cellulite or anxiety.

    She was also a brunette. ;>)

  13. The “flesh” story is hilarious, CPQ. I can just see you up there during the ceremony, trying to hold it all together. Now I am trying to think of which words make me cringe…hmmm…might have to do a post about that.

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