1. Never, and I mean NEVER, try to bluff your personal trainer into thinking you can handle whatever she’s about to dish out. Confidence has NO place in the gym.
Talk about your bum knee or that old war injury so she’ll go light on you.
Do NOT casually mention that you used to do similar workouts in high school. She will take that as a personal affront and will then school you and leave you in a painful heap of unidentifiable quivering flesh in the middle of the gym floor.
Your leg muscles will twitch involuntarily. Your lungs will crawl out of your esophagus trying to grasp whatever oxygen they can possibly find. You will consider cursing the day you were born on this planet.
You will also be so dad blamed sore that you cannot think coherently or lift your fingers to be able to type your blog post.
You have been warned.
2. I will do anything for food.
I even faked being a teacher.
I mentioned Wednesday that I had a fun little project going on. My IRL friend Gretchen is homeschooling this year and I off-handedly offered to do a multi-cultural lesson for her if she wanted me to, and she took me up on it. Stunned with the realization that I now had to come up with a lesson plan, I went to the market to pick up some typical foods that I ate as a youngster in Guatemala to take to her kids.
Gretchen warned me that her kids were a little hesitant to try new things, but they made a liar out of her. They tried everything. And liked it. And asked if they could keep the goat’s milk caramel at their house.
I also learned these are REALLY cute kids because I wouldn’t leave my caramel with just anybody.
3. I learned that a week’s worth of gym work can be undone by one visit to Kellie’s house.
Umm, that’s chocolate.
On yeast bread dough.
Go bug Kellie for the recipe or look for Chocolate Swirl Bread in in your mom’s Betty Crocker Cookbook.
4. I learned that it takes more time to write about a sheen-yon than it does to make one.
I also learned that I still want to have a girl.
5. I learned that I cannot stand to have a list that isn’t numbered to 5 or to 10.
I also learned that I can’t just have one sentence and leave it there without putting some running inane commentary underneath it.
Have a nice day.