Thoughts on daytime television

I’m still a little under the weather, as evidenced by the thoughts that crossed my mind as I lay on the couch, remote in hand, hacking out my lungs.

________________________________________________________

1. Maybe plastic surgery’s not such a bad option after all.

2.  If I had half of Maury’s paternity test business, I’d be a rich woman.

3. Three letters.  Q-V-C

4.  Who knew that for two easy payments of $19.99 I could solve my little “problem” painlessly?

5.  I bet Jeff Corwin could get the squirrels out of my attic.

6. 587 channels and I’m stuck on Cheaters?

7.  I would not cross Judge Judy.

8.  Where are my WKRP in Cincinnati reruns?

9.  I love the Wonderpets theme song.

10.  Bidding on the first showcase in such an amateur move.

If I’m still down tomorrow, we’re moving to Video on Demand.

Have a nice day.

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19 responses to “Thoughts on daytime television

  1. Bless your heart. Your eyes will probably start crossing soon!

  2. Number 10 : Isn’t that the truth…it’s like, why not have a sign tatooed on your forehead that says “Wimp lives here!”

    Can you tell that I spent many years in daycare watching that particular game show with my caregiver??

    I sure hope you feel better soon, your brain may not be able to handle too many days of this type of ‘entertainment’…

  3. Good move.

    When I had the flu two years ago…I joined the free trial membership of Ancestry.Com and traced my entire family tree for generations.

    I couldn’t handle the tv.

  4. 5. I bet Jeff Corwin could get the squirrels out of my attic.

    Or better yet, I bet Bear Grylls could get them out of your attic, then show you how to fricassee them.

    And there goes your “what’s for dinner?” problem as well.

  5. That last one is just such a profound truth. For sure rookie move.

  6. #4….I know, right! Did you see the one about the flat iron for your hair?

  7. #11. I’m pretty sure that Wendy Williams is a drag queen.

  8. Zach’s preschool teacher used to make floral topiaries for QVC. Oh, and I hate the WonderPets. I am staunchly against all kids’ shows that feature characters with speech impediments.

  9. is there room on your couch? the flu has hit our house. ick. luckily, i found this website. it will save us from eating mac and cheese for a week. http://crockpot365.blogspot.com

  10. Hope you’re feeling better soon…my youngest is coming home from university for two days tomorrow…she’s been sick since Saturday so I am really hoping I’m not the one posting about daytime tv next week.

  11. I knew we were meant to be friends, what with our Jeff Corwin (isn’t he the cutest thing?) and QVC connection. Jeff Corwin would just use your squirrels to lure out huge snakes, but then, he’d crawl them back up to some beautiful trees on a squirrel relocation program.

    Baby, if you’ve ever wondered…wondered whatever became of me. I’m living on the air in Cincinnati. Cincinnati, WKRP.

    I could go on, but that’s a little freaky, I’m sure.

  12. “This is sewious…we have to help her!” I ADORE the Wonderpets!! And, if you ever catch the Wonderpets saved the Poodle…well, it’s just the best!!!

    Speaking of theme songs…”Baby, if you ever wonder, wonder what ever became of me…” 😉 Love that one too!

  13. UGH…i shouldn’t just skim the comments section in an effort to speak of my theme song long–Gretch beat me to the punch!! DAG!

  14. Oh I so get the “587 channels and I’m watching _____?” I can’t believe how I’ll flip channels and find NOTHING — but still needing to ‘zone out’ will put some dumb show on.

    So get that!!

  15. You need to catch you a lovely Lifetime movie special, especially if it includes Meredith Baxter Berney, or Valerie Bertinelli. Those rock! 🙂

  16. Now CPQ…how could YOU of all people not give a single mention of our guilty pleasure Days in a daytime top ten list? I’m really disappointed. No mention of demon-possession, complete with green, glowing eyes? Or whether the phoenix will rise again? I demand a recount of the top ten!

  17. I love the Wonderpets theme song, too!

  18. You should have watched Dora, Diego and Kai Lan. Thanks to them my children are fluent in both Spanish and Chinese.

    By the way, found your blog via funny June. I love it! And I, too, love me my coffee. 🙂

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