Tuesday’s Turtle Tutorial

I’m within the 10 day Christmas Countdown window, so the list-making has begun in earnest.  I’ve got three lists on my kitchen table right now.  One is labeled “Dinner Menus”, the second “Christmas Baking”, and the third “Grocery List” to make sure I have the items for lists one and two.

At some point this week I’m making sausage balls, spiced almonds, white chocolate covered almonds (my California uncle sent me three pounds of almonds for Christmas – I’ll be making almond recipes until the cows come home), fudge, and gingerbread cookies.  I’m also eyeing some recipes for hot dips (mmm.. crab, anyone?) that I can make a day or two ahead and reheat so that I’m not in the kitchen all day on my birthday prepping for the snack/appetizer supper we always have after the Christmas Eve services at church.  I still haven’t decided on a dinner plan for Christmas Day, but I think I’m going to do beef of some sort and send Mr. CPQ outside to the smoker to prepare it.

The single most important Christmas candy has already been crossed off the to-do list.  While I was home visiting my folks, my mom encouraged me to go ahead and make my turtles so that I’d have one less thing to do when I came back to North Carolina.  They’re my annual gift to the neighbors, and they love them so much that they’ve begun asking me early in the month if I’ve made them yet.  I thought I’d share the recipe with you since they’re super quick and easy to make and delicious to boot.

And I went all Pioneer Woman on you and included pictures.

You’re welcome.

Turtles

44 Kraft Caramels, unwrapped

1 tablespoon evaporated milk

1 cup chopped pecans (more if you’re a nut freak)

chocolate almond bark for coating

Unwrap the 44 caramels and place inside a microwave safe bowl, add the tablespoon of evaporated milk, and start the microwave at 1 minute, adding 30 second increments until the caramels melt.

And take a moment to admire my mother’s clean microwave.

While the caramels melt in the microwave, rough chop your pecans.

Stir the caramel until it’s smooth, then add the pecans, stirring to combine.

Using either two spoons (or a spoon and well-buttered fingers), scoop out spoonfuls of the caramel pecan mixture and drop onto parchment paper.

This part can be tricky because the caramel is hot.  Be careful.

Or don’t be careful and walk around with burned fingers.

If you want to be extra sure the candy will come up, rub the parchment paper with butter.  I usually just let them cool for a good five minutes and they peel right off.

Your nekkid turtles should look like the following picture.

At this point, you can do one of two things.  If you’re chocolate averse or have friends that are allergic to chocolate, you can stop and just eat them as they are OR you can continue to the enrobing process to make them official turtles.

Grab some almond bark (and why do they call it almond bark when it contains no almonds?), and grab 3-4 blocks and melt them in the microwave according to package directions.

Again, the clean microwave.  I am so adopted….

Plunk your cooled nekkid turtle into the melted chocolate…

Roll it around until it’s covered, pick it up with a fork and let the excess chocolate drain off…..

Place it on parchment paper and let it sit/set for about 15 minutes.

That’s it!  You’re done.

See how easy that was?

Now, hide them from your children.

Have a nice day.

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31 responses to “Tuesday’s Turtle Tutorial

  1. ha! I noticed the squeaky clean microwave before you even commented on it! Those turtles look super awesome and I do plan on making those!! Thanks for the recipe. Good luck Christmas shopping with those three little boys home from school!! The one small downside of year-round school? I think I’d still take it!

  2. Deee-lish-us. This may be one of the few blog recipes I say I’ll try that I actually DO try.
    Btw, I’ve made an amazing hot seafood dip from a Paula Deen cookbook. Do you already have your own recipe? If not, I can send it to you….. have a happy day!

  3. That’s just plain impressive, CPQ.

    Jack just came in to tell me to “read CPQ’s blog and make that.”

    Thanks a lot. 😉

  4. ok so the part that most intimidated me was this: “Unwrap the 44 caramels” that seems time consuming.

    ps – is your birthday on Christmas eve? mine’s tomorrow and I’ll tell you what, Christmas bdays are the worst . . . .

  5. Oh Yum.

    And unwrapping the 44 caramels? That’s why I have 4 kids (well, only 3 that could actually unwrap). I think this might be a fun rainy day activity.

    And I totally laughed out loud at the clean microwave/adoption line.

  6. Oooh, you are making me want to make some! Except no one likes pecans but me and I certainly don’t need to eat a whole batch of turtles by myself. I just may have to halve the recipe!

  7. Totally noticed the clean microwave and stand in awe. My thoughts on it are, like a closet, the door stays shut..so why bother.

    Oh..and I can totally handle this recipe. No stovetop required. Score.

  8. Yum! These look really good & easy! I think I’ll make some! 🙂

  9. Oh wow! I am so much making these!!! Thanks! 🙂

  10. I could totally make these!
    Baking soda is the best thing to use to clean your microwave! 🙂

  11. Curse you Red Baron, for taking me down this path of caloric unrighteousness.

    You had me at: “44 Kraft caramels”.

  12. Thank you, thank you! I LOVE turtles…and that’s not even expressing my full love for them. Now I know how to make them….I’m a lazy baker….I’ve never even looked for a recipe for them. Thanks again.

  13. Yummy! I was gonna say delicious, but I can’t spell delicious. My sister and I are gonna make these next week and I’m using your recipe and my daddy’s pecans! Fantabulous!

  14. This post brought to you today by the letter A … as in Almond. 🙂

    Thanks for the recipe. I might try it for the work peeps.

    Oh, and my mom is freaky clean about her microwave. Does your clean yours whenever she visits? Mine does.

  15. You are so cool! Thanks for the pictures!!

  16. I think the clean microwave is a generational thing.

  17. Oh, now you’ve gone and thrown down the blogger gauntlet and gone all P-Dub on us. I just can’t keep up! LOL
    They look delish. I would liked mine robed, please.

  18. When/if our house ever sells, I want to move to your neighborhood so I can be a recipient of your neighbor gifts. 🙂

    Until then, I’ll try this recipe. Thanks for sharing.

  19. Wish I was your neighbor!!! Those look delicious! Anything with chocolate, pecans, and caramel definitely make me sit up and take notice. And, if I was your neighbor, I definitely would NOT let you peek inside my microwave (but would let you see my mother’s….spotless, of course!).
    Also, let me wish you an early Happy Birthday!

  20. I’m so glad you shared this with us! My granny used to make turtles every Christmas, but I never got her recipe and simply have never tried. I’ll have to now!

    Oh, and yeah. That microwave? I don’t think mine looked that good in the factory! Your mother must be amazing.

  21. Oh, you are the best…this is something i can do with the girls!!!!!

  22. My mouth is watering!!! And I probably won’t be able to make any yummies this year…

  23. I like it that at u 44 caramels, you have six left to munch on in the process. And yes, I’m in my kitchen at nine o’clock at night with my little Netbook making these little turkeys… I mean turtles.

    Let’s hope it turns out okay. If not, it’s all your fault. 🙂

  24. It’s too bad you have to waste a can of evaporated milk, though. What else can you do with evaporated milk?

    • My mom uses evaporated milk in her mashed potatoes.

      You can also use it to make hot fudge sauce to pour over ice cream.

      I’ve used it to make gravy for chicken fried steak, too.

      Or just stick it in the back of your fridge til it grows mold and then throw it out.

      Not that I’ve ever done that.

  25. Looks so delicious! I’ll have to try these!

    My favorite line in this post – “Again the clean microwave. I am so adopted” – I can so relate to this! I laughed out loud!

  26. YUM-O!!!!

    I’ll definitely try these this year!!!!

    Here’s a question, though…when working w/ the almond mark do you add shortening to it? I made the mistake (well, the recipe NEVER said to do that, but maybe I’m just bark-dumb) of NOT using it when making cake balls for Halloween and the bark was so thick and the cake was breaking off in it…it was a mess!

    Any tips, Marth..er, CPQ?

    • I’ve never added shortening to the bark. I’ve noticed that when I let the bark get too cool, it coats too thickly. Keep it warm and loose and make sure you have plenty in the bowl.

  27. These look really good…I need more days between now and Christmas! So much to do still…my kids come home this week and they’ll be greeted with an apron. At least they like to bake!

  28. Hey! I might try these. Maybe they will turn out better than my fudge. hee hee

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