Monthly Archives: January 2010

And in the “Oh no, she didn’t” category

We’re still talking about the dentist today.  I’m sorry.  I have to purge that dark episode from my psyche and writing about it is cathartic.

It also conveniently gives me a post for today.

I was well prepared for my appointment.  I’d been practicing my deep breathing, wore my killer boots that give me an extra dose of confidence (and an intimidation factor since they push me well over 6′), and loaded my iPod with soothing/very loud music to drown out the pick-y and whirring sounds which  tend to make me break out in hives.

I arrived early to my appointment in hopes they would get me in and out sooner, and to pass the time, I thought I’d listen to some of my music to settle my nerves.  It was then I discovered to my SHEER HORROR that my earbuds weren’t in my purse.  Or in my jacket pocket.  Or in my car.  Or under the car.  I desperately texted Whimzie:

“One of the kids took my set of earbuds.  You know…the set I was going to use DURING MY APPOINTMENT????”

She ever so calmly texted back:

“Okay. It sounds bad, but we can get through this.” (Do you see why I love this woman more than my luggage?)

“Are Travis’ still in the car?”

Oh, you mean, these?

I must have paused long enough for her to text me again.

“I know what you’re thinking, but SWALLOW YOUR PRIDE, WOMAN! This constitutes an emergency.  Drastic times calling for drastic measures and all.”

Do you think I used them?

Dang straight, I did.

Have a nice day.

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Is the Dentist’s Office BYOB?

Tuesday morning found me at my computer chatting on-line with Whimzie about the day’s agenda, the milk chocolate macadamia laceys at World Market, my Jersey hair, and what we could fix for supper that would satisfy at least three out of the five people in our family.  Whimz had already read my Monday post about dragging my feet over having to make appointments for doctor appointments so she harrassed the living life out of me offered gentle words of encouragement to just MAKE THE CALL.

One of those calls was to the dentist.  If you’ll recall, I have slight anxiety issues about going to the dentist (discussed here and here), and  this anxiety may or may not require a heavy overdose of prescription medication to overcome.  I was hoping that the very nice receptionist would tell me that they refused to ever have me darken their doors again, but sadly, they could fit me right in.

SO, while you’re reading this, I’ll be strapped into a chair, gripping the armhandles and praying for Jesus to return getting my teeth cleaned, vainly attempting to ignore  the awful sound of the spinny thing, trying not to feel self-conscious about a stranger being close enough to notice the size of my pores all the while controlling the urge to throw a Class A freak out and run screaming from the building.

Yes, I know I’m now 40 and expected to act maturely.  But 40’s the new 30, so I’m allowed.

Speaking of neurotic, I may use some of my chair time to ponder how Amy keeps her Tupperware drawer organized like this (scroll down to item #4 on her list).  WHO STACKS THEIR TUPPERWARE?

Someone else may need a prescription or two….

Have a nice day.

And in romantic news

Mr. CPQ brought home a new vacuum cleaner yesterday because our previous one was felled by carpet fuzz from the Great Carpet Installation Project of 2010.

It was not helpful that the motor on the old one burned out thirty minutes before company came over for dinner Sunday night, leaving my house with a lingering and distinct electrical odor that mixed ever so well with l’air du 10 year old boys and barbecue.

While Mr. CPQ is happy with all the buttons and gadgets, the boys are dancing circles over the fact that they now have eighteen new attachments to use as weapons of mass destruction against their siblings.

I’m a simple girl and practically giddy over the self-retracting cord.

Speaking of giddy, I was excited that I had TWO opportunities for outings with girlfriends yesterday.  My friend A. treated me to birthday lunch at my favorite ladies-who-lunch place, Zest.  We’ve been eating lunch together semi-regularly for three years and we never go any place else because the turkey burger at Zest is A THING OF BEAUTY.

I was supposed to meet other friends in the evening for my monthly poker night which amuses me to say because A) it sounds like a rabble rousing crew when really it’s a group of church ladies; B) we never play poker; and C) it’s a thinly veiled excuse to get together and eat cake.    The plans fell apart at the last minute but I didn’t want to waste my kitchen pass so I spur of the moment called a couple of friends that I’ve been trying to get together with for three weeks to ask if they had plans for supper, and I think they must be just like me because at 6 pm they were still staring blankly into the refrigerator searching for inspiration.

Forty-five minutes later we were happily esconced in a bowlful of guacamole and three baskets a basket of chips catching up with each other.

I came home to the sight of Mr. CPQ running the vacuum cleaner and I don’t think I’ve ever loved him more.

Enables my Mexican food cravings AND cleans the carpets?

I think I’ll keep him.

Have a nice day.

Topical Tuesday

I think sometimes fear hinders us not because we fear failure, but because we fear success.

Discuss.

Have a nice day.

Monday Musings

1.  The house must have reached epic levels of disaster because Mr. CPQ suggested to me on Saturday afternoon that we have a dinner party on Sunday night.

He would tell you that he was merely trying to experiment with new rib rubs and marinades for upcoming BBQ competitions, but I think the fact that we couldn’t walk through the living room without tripping over something meant it was time to find me some cleaning motivation.

2.  I love a feel good story so I’m happy that the Saints are going to the Super Bowl, but it’s causing me some consternation because they will be playing my favorite quarterback, Peyton Manning.  I’m going to have to do some deep soul searching to know for whom to cheer during the one football game a year I watch.

Time to start planning the menu. I do something different every year, and I’m not yet sure what it’s going to be. One thing’s for sure, there will be cream cheese.

Amen.

3.  It’s a fairly quiet week for me. My one goal is to get four doctor’s appointments scheduled.  You have permission to get on my case and hold me accountable for making the phone calls.  I absolutely abhor going to the doctor.

4.  Maybe related, I’m contemplating the concept of fear and how it hinders me.

5.  I’m also contemplating the leftover potato salad in the refrigerator and wondering how long before I succumb to its siren song.

Have a nice day.

Maybe, Maybe Not

I may or may not be typing this on my iPhone at a Panera.

I may or may not be insanely jealous of the woman at the table next to me who is eating two bagels all by herself.

I may or may not have stopped at the grocery store on the way to school this morning to buy breakfast and FEED IT TO MY CHILDREN IN THE PARKING LOT outside the store.

I may or may not be ready for Mr. CPQ to get back from his road trip.

I may or may not  have pulled out the whole “starving children in China” speech this morning at the boy who complained about peanut butter and jelly AGAIN in his lunchbox.

I may or may not have felt immediately horrible about my snippiness since it was my fault we were down to nothing in the cupboards.

I may or may not be on my 5th cup of coffee before 9 a.m.

I may or may not be headed to meet friends for coffee at 10.

I may or may not have found my written and addressed thank-you notes from Christmas in a stack of papers on the kitchen counter.

I may or may not have thought I mailed them three weeks ago.

I may or may not be in hot water with my mother and the  in-laws for that one.

Have a nice day.

Or not.

Ask Sus Three Questions Thursday

In which I make questions up, ask them of myself, and answer them, just to have something to say….

1. Why do you choose to read a particular person’s blog?

Confession:  I read a lot of blogs, even though I don’t always leave a comment.  In fact, if you’ve ever left a comment on my blog, I’ve most likely read yours and subscribed.  It’s a sickness, this addiction to the Google Reader Subscribe button.

A.

SICKNESS.

I read some blogs because I get tired of spaghetti and meatballs and I want inspiration in the kitchen department (or I just text Whimzie and see what she’s doing).  I read some blogs because they provoke me with their opinions with which I may or may not agree.  I read others because I in-real-life know the women behind the words and I like to know the daily-ness of what’s going on with them because we don’t see each other that often.  I read others because I think they’re good writers and I like to study their particular style to learn how and why it works.  I read some because they make me laugh.

And some blogs I read simply because I’m fascinated by the train wreck.

2.  Sus, do you like grape or strawberry jelly on your peanut butter sandwich?

I’m going to go out on a limb and say “neither”.  Yes, I know I gave myself two options that I didn’t even choose, but that’s how I roll. My favorite way to eat a peanut butter sandwich is JIF (always JIF) on white bread with lengthwise sliced bananas and a good drizzle of honey.

Big glass of milk, please, to accompany.

3.  Peanut butter and banana sounds like a match made in heaven, Sus.  Have you ever tried your hand at real matchmaking?

I was always a little boy crazy and dreamed up matches for myself on a daily basis, however only once have I tried to set up a friend with another friend.  I met Person A on-line several years ago and we’ve been friends ever since, chatting about this and that, my boys, her job, her dating life, etc.  About a year later, I met Person B through work acquaintances.  He happened to be single, attractive, employed, and conveniently lived in the same town as Person A.  While I didn’t know him well, I knew that he was easy-going and friendly, and that seemed to be enough for me to decide he’d make a good boyfriend for somebody.  I discretely inquired if he was interested in being set up and he was perfectly fine with it, so the wheels started turning in my head about how this was going to be sheer perfection for everyone.

I asked Person A if it would be okay for me (a random person she only knows on-line) to give her PRIVATE PERSONAL INFORMATION to Person B (a mere acquaintance of the random person she only knows on-line) so they could hit it off, fall in love, and live happily ever after.  She was feeling adventuresome and said, “Why not?”  So, I gave Person B her number and hoped for the best.

The best was not to be.

It was only after I set my wonderful little plan in motion that I discovered through other people that while Person B was perfectly nice and lovely, turns out that he had a bit of an “IRS problem” over this little thing called “tax evasion” and turns out he was no longer gainfully employed because he got fired.

Oh, don’t worry, friend.  He’s not an axe murderer.  He’s an unemployed convicted felon.

And thus ended my matchmaking career.

Have a nice day.

P.S. Person A and I are still speaking to each other.  Every friendship needs a good story to cement it, right?