It was Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom around my house this weekend. I decided it was time to tackle the wash that had sat for a week in the floor of the laundry room and apparently when I scooped the clothes up and put them in the machine, I brought along a friend or two that Cosmo had hidden under the pile. It wasn’t until I had completed the cycle and reached in to pull out the freshly dried clothes that I noticed the dead lizard tucked in the corner by the dryer vent.
The children noticed when I ran through the house screaming to get the willies out.
JJ told me, “You need to face your fears, Mom” and I decided that outsourcing fear for $1 was money well spent so he kick-started a lucrative career in pest management by removing the offending creature for me.
Really, it’s just good training; all men need “save a damsel from distress” skills.
Two hours later the SAME THING happened again and I jokingly accused him of sticking lizards in the dryer just to make money and the gleam in his eye told me that he didn’t do it but that it might be a great idea to file away should future economic conditions require extra cash.
I was a little twitchy from my close encounters of the dead kind so last night when I went into the powder room and stepped on something lumpy underneath the bathroom rug, I yelled out that I needed a hero and sent Mr. CPQ in to investigate. He decided the best approach would be to beat the living daylights under whatever might still be breathing underneath the rug and after he was assured of its demise, he pulled it back to reveal an amalgam of mismatched Legos.
Easiest money he ever made.
Have a nice day.