Five on Friday

By the time you’re reading this, I’ll be sitting in a dentist’s chair, hallucinating and hopefully NOT singing Onward Christian Soldiers at the top of my lungs and making untoward remarks to the dentist like I did in my twenties on the occasion of my first exposure to laughing gas.

I’m actually looking forward to getting a little narcotic assistance because I think it’s going to help relieve the pain resulting from a very close encounter I had on Thursday at Kroger as I reached for a heavily discounted pack of Ramen and misjudged the distance between my head and the edge of the shelf.

Shelf 1.  Sus 0.

ANYWAY, in honor of Dentist Day, I thought I’d do a little thematic list for 5 on Friday for your amusement and/or edification.

Drumroll, please.

5.  The number of cavities I’m getting filled.

4.  The number of times this week I’ve considered moving to Mongolia.

3.  The number of pieces of nervous cake I’ve eaten.  Which may or may not have a direct relationship to number 5 above.

2.  The number of crowns I’ll be getting.

1.  The number of Valium pills I’ll need to take just to walk through the front door.

Hey, better living through chemistry, right?

Have a nice day.

13 responses to “Five on Friday

  1. Aw girl I’m sorry – I hope it goes ok! I’ll be praying for you this morning. Oh and if it makes you feel better, I haven’t been to the dentist in YEARS and I’m almost positive I have at least 5 cavities too!

  2. Oh, I hope everything goes okay and you have an amazing dentist who will make sure you don’t feel a thing during or after!

    I have to laugh at myself. Today I posted with the title Five Things Friday and I thought what a great title it was and how smart I was to come up with it. Now I remember that you do Five On Friday and see where I came up with it! 🙂

  3. Why are you doing two crowns in one day???? Is it because you have an ‘I might never come back here if I don’t ‘ thought running thru your brain?

    Hoping you have an ipod to plug into while you’re in the chair! Thinking of you today…

  4. Hang in there girl! I hope it’s not too bad for you today. Some things in life are just no fun, huh? I hope you have a great weekend to make up for it all!

  5. Ugh. This just gave me an unwanted flashback.
    I hope you plan on taking the rest of the day off. As in… hitting the couch being waited on by all your men folk.
    P.S. I think it’s just a travesty they call those things crowns. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
    I’m just sayin’

  6. Glad to know I am not the only one who has almost been taken out by a shelf while shopping. And I really need to go to dentist but am even more scared than you. seriously.

  7. Oh, HONey, this does not sound like a fun day. Last week I had four mammogram squishes, then had to return later in the week for three more. Wish I could have had some of those narcotics 😉 Or maybe some poison darts to shoot at the sadistic mammogram technician, who tried to make me think I was being a baby when — sob! — I was not. I feel your pain and hope the day’s operations are a success.

  8. Dentists are evil.
    No amount of laughing gas will convince me otherwise.

  9. …singing Onward Christian Soldiers at the top of my lungs and making untoward remarks to the dentist…

    Once again, my kingdom for some security camera footage.

  10. When I first read the part of “narcotic assistance”, I read it as “neurotic assistance!” I think I projected a little of myself into that one.

  11. Was praying for you today!!!

  12. oh that head crack sounds so awful!

    though I’d rather crack my own noggin a million jillion times more than having to climb into that chair… valum or no.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s