Tuesday Tidbits

1.  I must have been wearing my “tell me your life story” sign last night when we took the kids to On The Border for dinner.  They got more than their money’s worth for the two-item combo when the waitress started volunteering information about her IUD and her 400 pound boyfriend.

Oh, I wish I were kidding.

2.  And speaking of boyfriends, my very first boyfriend (we were both eight years old) sent me a friend request on Facebook yesterday.  Talk about misty watercolor memories flooding the corners of my mind.  He’s the one for whom I emptied my snack box, got busted for kissing in a tree, and who dumped me for the older girl who was addicted to mascara and blue eyeshadow.

Not that I’m bitter.

Or hold a grudge.

3.  Speaking of boyfriends again, I was telling my husband some disastrous dating stories last night and he said, “So what you’re really saying is that I rescued you.”

Well, if you want to get all big-headed about it.

4.  And while we’re on the subject of hair, mine was so puffy today that I might as well have held dual citizenship.  I’ve not had a hair cut since March since I’ve been in a growing out phase and it needed to be thinned as well as restored to its original color so I took a walk-in appointment at a nearby salon and only after the color was applied did I find out that it was my hairdresser’s first day back on the job after a six-year hiatus from doing hair.

Eek.

It was too late to do anything about it at that point, and I was so grateful to not resemble Cruella Deville that I didn’t closely look at the results until I happened to notice the GINORMOUS BLACK SPLOTCHY STAIN on the side of my face after I had spent half an hour wandering Dillards talking to salespeople about dressy but not too dressy more to the side of casual enough to go to the grocery store yet nice enough to wear to lunch with a friend kind of pants.

And FYI, soap and water aren’t that effective at removing hair color stains.

And double FYI, I was supposed to go to Mr. CPQ’s office to meet his new business associates.

So I combed my hair forward and bought new shoes to provide a distraction.

5.  Those shoes matched the bruise that still exists on my cheek from my dentist’s appointment.

Because I’m nothing if not fashionable.

Have a nice day.

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18 responses to “Tuesday Tidbits

  1. Which shade of bruise did you buy? The purple-ish blue? The greenish? The brownish?
    Now I’m intrigued.

  2. I couldn’t get past #1 without cackling. You are one funny friend. I love it.

  3. Number one = oh.my.goodness. Is it just me, or has EVERYONE lost their filtering system??

    Number four = I wish I knew enough about fashion to have the ‘pants’ discussion with the salespeople. Did the shoes / hair provide the right amount of distraction?? Inquiring minds want to know…

    Have a nice day!

  4. Oh no! Other than the big ol’ bruise, how did the hair turn out? And how fun that you heard from the “misty water colored memory” guy!

    Very funny!!

  5. Shoes are always a distraction!
    I was CRACKING up with all the boyfriend comments.
    Have a great week.

  6. How’d you handle the “uh, Mom, what’s an IUD?” question at dinner. Yikes. Filter, people. Filter!

  7. I’d just like to point out that your 4th sentence under bullet #4 contains a total of 91 words.

    Caffeine overload again?

  8. That’s classic. I was kinda hoping your kids weren’t with you but I guess you can file it under ‘educational’ : )

    You and my hubs could swap some stories!

  9. Really funny post! Plus, I love the comments today! 🙂 I didn’t know I should be counting words! 🙂 hehe

  10. A walk in for color? You are a very brave girl. Between the dentist bruising and the stain-on-the-face, someone might offer you a ride to a safe house.

  11. I color my own. Yikes. Better than trusting a Turk, IMO. I discovered that scrubbing your face with nail polish remover can be a bit abrasive on the complexion. So, don’t try that.

  12. New hair, bruises and shoes….what’s up with the no picture thing?

  13. Yes…need to see the shoes. And BTW I am from Des Moines and while we do deep fried Twinkies, Snickers, pickles, and sometimes bacon very well cheese steaks we do not.

  14. I think we need some PICTURES!

  15. Mrs CPQ – you are a riot! Talking of old boyfriends, about 5 years ago I got an internet note from one of my first ones – we were 15 and 16 at the time and it lasted about 18 months – then after (hmm) 48 or so years, we now correspond by email quite frequently – I live in a different country now but we have met once since renewing our ‘friendship’ – it’s rather nice to be friends again after all this time. Blessings!

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