I think about having a daughter a lot. Don’t get me wrong, I love my sons and don’t feel incomplete by not having one but since I enjoy being a girl, wife, daughter, and mother, there’s a wee part of me that’s a teensy bit jealous of my friends that have pink ones running through their houses.
Part of the wistfulness is, rightly or wrongly, I feel like moms and daughters are better equipped to have an ongoing conversation throughout life because for the most part daughters become mothers and, if they’re like me, they call Mom frequently (because she’s always right) to make sure they aren’t screwing up their kids and to receive assurance they, in fact, will survive *insert whatever phase you’re going through now*.
Lately, some not-quite-formed observations about being a woman in today’s social media saturated environment have swirled in my brain. Gone are the women who trust confidently in their identity in Christ, who rest peacefully in God’s calling on their lives, and who are comfortable reading and studying and understanding the Bible on their own. It seems like everywhere I look I see sheep, following this blogger or that blogger, feverishly retweeting or sharing “celebrity Christian” status updates, clinging to other people’s opinions (that are often driven by the need to generate clicks and ad revenue) and substituting some other person’s interpretation for thinking for themselves.
It has to stop.
So today, n0n-existent daughter, here are some things your mom wants you know:
1. Stop looking to others for validation.
You have been created by God Almighty for a relationship with Him. You have been called, gifted, and equipped to bear witness to His glory. Your character speaks for itself and no kudos or high fives or likes or shares or Klout score or followers or name recognition have anything to do with how precious you are to Him.
2. Be informed but be careful where you get the information to form your opinions.
There are lots of loud policy debates taking place every day. First of all, be strong doctrinally and know your Bible, forwards and backwards. Gauge everything you hear against the truth of the Word. Take care to avoid the wolves in sheep’s clothing who rip apart the Church with their careless remarks, who bring shame upon women for standing on the Word. They hide their swords behind snark and they are dangerous.
Avoid those who enjoy stirring the pot. Don’t allow them to inject bitterness and rancor into your heart. The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, and patience, not strife.
3. Trust God, not other bloggers or authors, to lead you in the way He’d have you go.
Confused about what that means? It will never be inconsistent with His Word or with His character. It won’t feel coerced or guilt driven.
4. You are an adult. Act like one.
That starry-eyed feeling when you talk about your favorite Christian speaker, blogger, pastor, theologian? You aren’t a teenager anymore and this isn’t American Idol. Don’t let your appreciation for someone’s words cross into adulation. Take a look at your re-tweets, your Facebook timeline – who are you consistently lifting up? Last I checked, the ground is level at the cross.
5. Keep your eyes on Jesus, the Author of your faith.
Don’t look at the world, or hang your hat on the opinions of others. Shut out the voices that tell you what you ought to do, what you should be doing. Open the Word and sit under its authority. I recently heard someone say that the Word is the essence of life and to avoid drinking deeply of it means to invite detriment to yourself. Bring spiritual health, maturity, wisdom, and assurance into your life by learning from the Master himself. He generously gives to those who seek Him and in Him you will have all you need.
That’s what’s on my heart today, pretend child of mine.
I hope you listen to your mama.
She’s always right.
Have a nice day.