Monday Musings

I think about having a daughter a lot.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my sons and don’t feel incomplete by not having one but since I enjoy being a girl, wife, daughter, and mother, there’s a wee part of me that’s a teensy bit jealous of my friends that have pink ones running through their houses.

Part of the wistfulness is, rightly or wrongly, I feel like moms and daughters are better equipped to have an ongoing conversation throughout life because for the most part daughters become mothers and, if they’re like me, they call Mom frequently (because she’s always right) to make sure they aren’t screwing up their kids and to receive assurance they, in fact, will survive *insert whatever phase you’re going through now*.

Lately, some not-quite-formed observations about being a woman in today’s social media saturated environment have swirled in my brain.  Gone are the women who trust confidently in their identity in Christ, who rest peacefully in God’s calling on their lives, and who are comfortable reading and studying and understanding the Bible on their own.  It seems like everywhere I look I see sheep, following this blogger or that blogger, feverishly retweeting or sharing “celebrity Christian” status updates, clinging to other people’s opinions (that are often driven by the need to generate clicks and ad revenue) and substituting some other person’s interpretation for thinking for themselves.

It has to stop.

So today, n0n-existent daughter, here are some things your mom wants you know:

1.  Stop looking to others for validation.

You have been created by God Almighty for a relationship with Him.  You have been called, gifted, and equipped to bear witness to His glory.   Your character speaks for itself and no kudos or high fives or likes or shares or Klout score or followers or name recognition have anything to do with how precious you are to Him.

2.  Be informed but be careful where you get the information to form your opinions. 

There are lots of loud policy debates taking place every day.  First of all, be strong doctrinally and know your Bible, forwards and backwards.  Gauge everything you hear against the truth of the Word.  Take care to avoid the wolves in sheep’s clothing who rip apart the Church with their careless remarks, who bring shame upon women for standing on the Word.  They hide their swords behind snark and they are dangerous.

Avoid those who enjoy stirring the pot.  Don’t allow them to inject bitterness and rancor into your heart.  The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, and patience, not strife.

3.  Trust God, not other bloggers or authors, to lead you in the way He’d have you go. 

Confused about what that means?  It will never be inconsistent with His Word or with His character. It won’t feel coerced or guilt driven.

4.  You are an adult.  Act like one.

That starry-eyed feeling when you talk about your favorite Christian speaker, blogger, pastor, theologian?  You aren’t a teenager anymore and this isn’t American Idol.  Don’t let your appreciation for someone’s words cross into adulation.  Take a look at your re-tweets, your Facebook timeline – who are you consistently lifting up?  Last I checked,  the ground is level at the cross.

5.  Keep your eyes on Jesus, the Author of your faith.

Don’t look at the world, or hang your hat on the opinions of others. Shut out the voices that tell you what you ought to do, what you should be doing.  Open the Word and sit under its authority.  I recently heard someone say that the Word is the essence of life and to avoid drinking deeply of it means to invite detriment to yourself.  Bring spiritual health, maturity, wisdom, and assurance into your life by learning from the Master himself.  He generously gives to those who seek Him and in Him you will have all you need.

That’s what’s on my heart today, pretend child of mine.

I hope you listen to your mama.

She’s always right.


Have a nice day. 


18 responses to “Monday Musings

  1. offthebeatenpathministries

    Amen! Thanks for sharing your strong thoughts today, Susan. I agree with them, but I also needed to hear them. I drank them in! Indeed, there is no replacement for one-on-one instruction, encouragement, filling and conviction from the Lord Himself. He is sufficient. And because He is, we are sufficient, too. Maybe one of these days you’ll have a daughter in law who will benefit from your godly encouragement and wisdom. I hope so, because you have so much to give to a young woman. Blessings, dear friend!

  2. Thank you for that reset button. All of the loud rancor does not yield a fragrant offering–nor does it draw others to Jesus. May God forgive me for my errant imbibing, from time to time. Surely, I have much better things to be doing. This rest I’m on reminds me of that. Once again, thinking of deleting my Twitter, so I won’t get sucked in.

  3. I’d gladly have any of my four daughters call you for advice or reassurance. I’ll share. 😉 And I’m praying for sweet daughters in law, maybe even one who – like me – hungers for a wise Christ-loving mama to be able to call.

    Also, I think we’re going to St. Louis for SDR for Zoe in the fall for a month-ish, and I’ve been meaning to see if you’d be up to being a stand-in for me in keeping Patu for a day or maybe even one day a week? The other four will be in school with after-school care, so it’s just Patu who we’ll need covered, so I’m working on a team of folks who might be able to each cover a day or two a week or be back-up for those who can… so you can play Mama to a pink-loving one for a bit if you’re up for it then.

  4. Wow. This is really good. And I feel very conflicted about my desire to tweet or Facebook a link to this post 🙂

  5. Daughter, I am VERY proud of you…I’m learning from YOU these days.

  6. Looking in the mirror on this one. Although I shy away from religious politics and do my best to keep my mouth shut about “the busine$$ of Jesus,” I am reminded through your words that I look to a certain beloved bible study writer way too much. And perhaps a well-know financial peace dude. Thank you!

    P.S. I know a certain little Peanut who would enJOY a wise(r) “mommy” in her life! Bring it!!! 😉

  7. I understand your wistfulness. I wouldn’t trade my boys for all the pink hairbows and glitter in the world, but an addition to them has part of my imagination.
    Great post, Susan. You keep me on my toes.

  8. U have written some real keepers, Susan, but this is the best! Testifying about the power of our Lord is eternal joy!! You are on my Super Special List! Love, Hope, Peace, & JOY!

    Nelda Swift

  9. Whoa. You go, girl.

  10. Excellent advice for all: male or female!

  11. LOOOOVEEEE this post! Thank you! Cannot wait to see who God gives you as a first daughter or since you have triplets there could be multiple daughters at once 🙂

  12. Candace Chaney

    so so so so so so so so good.

    thanks momma. 🙂

  13. Great wisdom. Excellent post. And you never know on the daughter thing. When Candace and I moved to Kentucky for seminary, the Lord put us in relationship with a wonderful couple who we still love and are still in relationship with. Even though “Happy” (as Asher calls her) is only 17 years older than us, she was still our mom when we were so far away from home and Candace and her have shared a special relationship these past 12 years. So maybe God will give you an adopted 25 year old daughter down the line. 🙂

  14. Amen. This was quite excellent.

  15. These words may not benefit a daughter of yours, but they will certainly benefit mine. Thanks for sharing in words that echo my heart so much more eloquently than any I could put together.

  16. stephaniecanipe

    Amen! Great stuff.

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